How long have I traveled? What did it take for me to get here? Is the length of time proportionate to the lessons that I learned? Have I learned from experiences? If so, how do I know that I have learned from experiences?
I believed that maturity happens with the apparent seamlessness of conscious thoughts. Maturity, like the fermentation of wine or cheese gives more "body" to the senses and thought processes, while believing that maturity is a positive phenomenon.
I have traveled far but not far enough, as I felt that the better part of me has not blossomed yet. The coming together of what are the best qualities of me, have not surfaced in harmony as yet. But it will come as surely as a lot of things that had come into fruition before.
It took a far amount of having to grow up and coming to terms about a lot of things for me to get here. And here is nowhere yet. Here is just a reflection point in time.
You cannot measure experience as you cannot measure time. You may have milestones or rites of passage, perceived through one tunnel, and then leading to another. Some tunnels led to nowhere and even dead ends. And some led to ideas and discoveries.
Experiences are like shifting sands, formed by the currents or the winds in the dessert, formed for awhile and then reformed again and again. Not the object but the process of change. Experiences are fluid and not motionless. Embracing the wind the maker of it, the currents that shifts it into temporal forms. Experiences may be learned once and deposited and surfaced again later, but in different guise, touching you in recognition, emboldened your position to act upon the next decision or action.
I know that I have learned from experiences when I realise that I am no more that person that I was a week ago, a year ago, a decade ago and that is a positive thing because I let myself be free of expectations.
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